20 November 2008, 9:47 am
Would you like to marry A) Arsene Wenger- he would be faithful and loyal and back you to the end, he is great at raising kids, he is known to be a great cook and even was a special celebrity chef for Tottenham Hotspur before their last game of the 2005-2006 season and if you choose to cheat on him its alright because he “didn’t see a thing”….however hes really stingy so birthday and christmas…..so if your into your shopping forget it! B) Sir Alex Ferguson- A really moany old alcoholic man but he is very good at what he does, however he is also loyal but he tends to go into drunken states of rage where he has been shown to physically attack you, even though he is old he can kick a hell of a boot!He loves chewing gum and shouting, if your Portugese, fast and gay he is the man for you, however if you have a job at the BBC I wouldn’t bother. C)Rafa Benitez- If your into a relationship where do don’t have to smile or be happy, who thinks bringing spice to a relationship is growing a goatee and who is just in lurrrrrve with Spanish people D) Harry Redknapp- They don’t call him "Harry I Kidnapped Houdini" for nothing. He is a very good lover however he was involved in a terrible car crash a couple of years back which has left him slighty disfigured but hes still a great guy. Hes great if you want to be slapped about or cheated on as he is about as loyal as a fruit fly. E) Martin O’Neill- If you get through the harsh accent and the constant moaning you could have a great guy, but beware this guy is into football a little too much and don’t be surprised to wake up in the middle of the night and have his hairy body breathing over you whilst saying “sorry to wake you dear but I need you opinion on this, I think I have a new formation which would really support Gabby up front, if I move James out to the left and let Gareth sit back a bit more….” F) Jose Mourinho- Hes hot, hes got(it all), hes not going to let you down, however this guy will love himself more than he loves you. They don’t call him ‘HOse’ for nothing, but be aware that he does like to talk for hours and hours whilst looking in the mirror. He is also rumoured to like womens lingerie so keep them locked up tight as he is the ‘special one’….they called him that at school when he dressed up as a girl! G) Avram Grant- Mr Nice Guy but unfortunately looks like Jabba the Hutt from Star Wars but whatever floats your boat! H) Steve Mclaren- He is a your run of the mill loser but as loyal as a puppy dog, however hes has been exiled from England for being a general failure, hes in Holland now so if you fancy a change go for it! Good luck choosing your new partner... Read More »
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